Why Don't You Kill Yourself?

EL TOPO: I think I need a rape shower

2010-07-11T15:44:00.000-07:00

I am not well acquainted with the work of Alejandro Jodorowsky. What a renaissance madman; film maker, philosopher, shaman, author, lecturer and he probably works at a vet ER and saves puppies on the weekends.

So I went to see El Topo, one of the original "midnight movies"...Oh man, I felt so dirty. The movie was dirty. Filthy even. But in the best necessary way possible. This film was a psycho-delic spaghetti western with Catholic imagery, drag queens, amputees, midget sex and more. Yes, I loved it but I think I need a nice long hot rape shower afterwards.

BP CARES- it's a hoax

2010-07-10T16:19:00.000-07:00

BP Cares the party/clothing line/PR campaign masterminded by the renegade lifestyle website/store front, Street Giant is a GIANT HOAX. I don't understand why they would do this. I find it really insensitive and unnerving that they are treating this matter like it's a big fucken joke. BP sucks and by starting a tshirt line called BP Cares (Ok, I get it, irony city) and throwing an art show with really good art showcasing the devastation reflected in some really talented artists' works is like giving Idi Amin a cooking show on the Food Network.

I don't find it funny at all. I don't like the joke. I know they are trying to terrorize the public image of BP but like it's already toast. This kind of exposure to sell some t-shirts seems really fucked up.

HIPSTERS COME TO THE AID OF BP- I GAG

2010-07-10T14:45:00.001-07:00

THIS WAS AN EVENT I GOT INVITED TO ON FB. WHEN I READ THIS, I WAS LIKE, "NO FUCKEN WAY, THIS CAN'T BE FUCKEN REAL." IF THIS IS GENUINE, I FEEL SORRY FOR THE HIPSTER SHITHEADS DANCING AND DRINKING CRAPPY BEER TO REPAIR THE "SOILED IMAGE" OF BP. THIS IS NOT THE WAY TO REPAIR YOUR IMAGE- WHAT? BY USING THE SCENE, ART AND FASHION AS A BAND-AID TO COVER UP THE FUCKEN HORRIFYING ENVIRONMENTAL GENOCIDE AND THE POOR FISHERMEN IN THE GULF.
"BP has lost a lot of good oil, a lot of money and worst yet, people have lost respect for the brand."---TELL THAT TO ALL THE PLANTS ANIMALS AND WORKING CLASS PEOPLE ON THE GULF COAST. FUCK YOU BP- YOU'RE THE ENVIRONMENTAL HITLER OF CORPORATIONS. THERE ARE MORE OUT THERE BUT YOUR DUMB ASS GOT CAUGHT IN THE ACT.

We, the good people who work for @BPGlobalPR, are deeply saddened about the terrible publicity BP has received since the oil started spilling into the Gulf of Mexico over two months ago. The spill has been an absolute nightmare. BP has lost a lot of good oil, a lot of money and worst yet, people have lost respect for the brand. This is why we want you to help us save it- we are pleased to announce the BP Cares Art Show and Sexy Party at De La Barracuda on July 10!! You can do your part by coming out and drinking free beer, looking at art, buying some stuff and dancing your face off. Unfortunately, most of the proceeds have to go the Gulf Restoration Network. They are a bunch of hippies trying to preserve and protect the Gulf of Mexico from this current spill and future spills. Blah blah, BORING.

We've got super cool artists like:

Ken Garduno
Skull Phone
Jeff McMillan
Andrew Foster
Mattia Biagi and more.

A $5 donation will have you boozing down from 1-8 pm AND doing your part to help repair BP's image in the community. After all, it's not just about the devastated people and wildlife in the Gulf, it's also about making money and getting people to like us again.

Yours Truly,
The BPGlobalPR team@bpglobalpr on Twitter

Pre- Order your $5.00 donation here:
http://www.streetgiant.bigcartel.com/product/bp-cares-5-00-donation

***Disclaimer - @BPGlobalPR is in no way associated with the real BP. The company that has been destroying the gulf for the last 80 days.

Annie and Nam KBBQ

2010-04-01T17:58:00.000-07:00

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Namella's List of Drunk Irish/ Korean Commonalities:

2009-12-29T09:41:00.000-08:00

1. Cries, for no real reason. Just likes the feeling of tears falling down their face...maybe because tears taste like whiskey or soju.

2. Sings. Drinking songs are taught to children. Yea, it's like that.

3. Fights. Nothing is more amusing to watch than a Korean bar fight 'cause someone always tries some crazy Tae Kwon Do shit and it looks really funny. It is always not effective in taking someone down, but man, it just looks really fucken hilarious when some drunk Korean dude flies through the air with one leg out, twisting into some weird position, then fucken lands like a new born giraffe, all wobbly and shit. Irish guys just like to fight and they're good at it. Most non African American or Latin American boxers are Irish and Koreans. Watch the fucken Olympics if you don't believe me.

4. Tells really long ass stories that don't really say much but sound really interesting for the first 2 minutes. Kinda like this message.

5. Beats their kids. Only after the kids fuck up their drinking song recital. Ever been in a recital? It's fucken gay as hell and the pressure is like great enough to turn a piece of coal between your ass cheeks into diamond.

6. Outside of them English soccer (football) fans, Irish and Koreans love their fucken football like a fat kid loves food. My old advertising agency used to rep the Korean soccer team. Their slogan was "Be The Reds"- I really resented that because it made us, Koreans, seem grammatically challenged. I can't believe people pay other people to come up with useless shit like that- and they pay LOTS of fucken money. OK I want to volunteer my advertising service to the Irish Team "Be The Drunks". Now PAY ME BITCH!!!!

Hail Satan!

2009-12-11T00:26:00.000-08:00

Ok, so I did something that is terribly creepy gross that I am even feeling ashamed. This is coming from a woman who pissed on the front door of Spaceland while shocked hipsters walked in. Why? For not letting her in because she was sooooo drunk, the retarded doll-haired door guy denied entry - mind you this is Spaceland where the Imperial ButtWizards used to blow up the club. Literally.

I wish I could take what I did back but the seed has been sewn. Oh and what a delightful and dirty seed it was. Unfortunately it sprouted and germinated into my entire being. When I think about him, my heart beats rapidly like a big ass caterpillar line of coke and and my palms begin to stigmata sweat.

Will he call me after the desperate, honest, soul baring message I sent him on mySpace? Yes, I had to revert to mySpace because I met him on Facebook and then promptly deleted him after the tryst.

I wonder what will happen. Like his explanation of death, I guess it is a big mystery afterall.

Sigh.

Yo Homies!!!

2009-12-08T17:13:00.001-08:00

Hey...so I am blogging now, which is a relief for people that got bombarded with really personal and disturbing posts to the random strangers on my facebook being forced to painfully live out my public shame called life.

Ok, so you made it here with me! Yay! You must really like me, you really think my pathetic life makes you laugh or you're just really entertained by my insanity and obsessiveness. Whatever the case, I am so glad you are here. Man, I tell ya. This is gonna be the start of a strange relationship. I hope you can handle it. I will pour out my heart and soul- maybe share a few photos and get you to crack up. Yes, yes so i will be posting more of my fashion photos and if you're lucky (over 18) you might see some dirty ones I did. Hee hee.

OK I gotta run but I just wanted to say thanks for coming and hope you will be an active participant in this experiment.

Blogging Sucks

2009-07-30T01:03:00.000-07:00

But, I have been told it is therapeutic. I guess it's the polite way of saying, "You need therapy, dear." My friends are passive aggressive in that sense.

Tonight I went to see The Soft Pack (nee The Muslims.) I wore my tightest dress sans bra. I handed them a CD from the band I am currently managing. My boobs are my calling card. I hate to admit it but it's true. Men and boobs. It's such a base formula. I don't know what good this does. We shall see.

I brought my 6 year old nephew to see the band. I hope he came away with a sense of good music.